By Patrick Gaul

Wouldn’t it be great if caring for family members were as simple as it is in the animal world?  Humans have a way of complicating everything.  We work to provide for our family, but being at work keeps us from the family that needs us. 

Approximately 4 percent of the phone calls that Ease@Work receives from employees pertain to concerns the employee has about aging parents.  And, as the population ages, the number of calls we receive for eldercare increases.

In her blog titled “Caregiving Can Be a Balancing Act,” Ease@Work eldercare specialist Kathryn Kilpatrick describes a typical situation in which a woman struggles with the multiple responsibilities of being a caregiver:

“Not only was this woman caring for dad, but her mother was very hard of hearing and visually impaired. In a baby seat on the kitchen counter top sat a three month old. He was the caregiver’s first grandchild who stayed with her two days a week while his parents were at work.”

The woman Kathryn is describing is her client. However for the sake of this blog, let’s focus on the key member of the family who is not in this scene.  This caregiver’s son or daughter is at work.  Is this employee concerned about the stress that their mother is under due to the added responsibility of caring for the child as well as her parents? 

I’d like to think the employee is concerned.  If so, are thoughts of this situation causing a distraction at work?  Most likely it is.   Could one additional stressor in the caretaker’s situation cause this employee’s childcare arrangements to fall through?  Absolutely.  This is a great example of an employee with potential childcare needs as well as the eldercare needs.  

This is a precarious situation, however, the assistance of an eldercare and childcare specialist can minimize the potential for family and work disruption.  Fortunately, this caregiver is already receiving help from an eldercare specialist.  Kathryn helps many Ease@Work employees every year.  If you want to hear how this particular caregiver’s situation was addressed, follow the link above to read the rest of Kathryn’s blog. 

Many employees prefer to have a trusted relative care for the child instead of an institutional daycare center.  Whenever a relative is counted on to provide childcare arrangements, there is always the risk that the arrangements can fall through.  A daycare center is more reliable than family in most cases because there is enough staff to fill in when an employee calls in sick.  When a relative is counted on for childcare, it is important to have a plan in place for back up care beyond utilizing sick time to care for the child.  Ease@Work’s childcare specialist can help with backup care arrangements for employees relying on a relative for childcare.

A close-knit family can be a real blessing and can make life much simpler for parents who are in the workforce.  The situation in Kathryn’s blog brings into focus though the importance of taking care of your caregivers.  Just because mom doesn’t “work” doesn’t mean that she is not working incredibly hard.  Utilize the resources that are available through your EAP to make sure you are doing everything you can to help the caregivers in your life, and to be sure you are prepared with a back up plan.

What caregivers need to be concerned about and where to find help

By Valerie S. Nosek

It’s the middle of the night and your phone rings. You answer to find your elderly mother sounding worried. She thinks someone is lurking around her house; she’s heard some “funny” noises and can’t sleep.

Maybe you make your routine evening stop at your dad’s house after work, and find that he had fallen earlier in the day and couldn’t get up or get to the phone to call someone for help. Or perhaps your elderly aunt is mixing up the times when she’s supposed to take her medications and is repeating doses at the wrong times.

Any of these situations (and many more!) are possible when loved ones begin to age. Some are physically and mentally able to live alone for many years without worrying family members, however, many will begin to experience difficulties, making safety a concern.

But how do you know when it’s no longer safe for an aging loved one to live alone? Does it take a major injury or mishap, or are there ways of assessing one’s ability to live independently before something bad happens?

Some reasons to be concerned about an elderly person’s safety: 

• You notice changes in hygiene or personality
• Physical impairments or disease is affecting one’s ability to manage their daily activities
• Your loved one is in the early stages of Alzheimer’s or are diagnosed with dementia
• You discover they are experiencing slips, trips or falls

 Additional signs to watch for:

• Losing/misplacing keys and other items, such as a purse or wallet
• Leaving keys in door locks or the car ignition
• Leaves doors open or unlocked
• Forgetting about items they are cooking – leaving the stove on
• Not taking medications at the right times/right days
• Has difficulty in performing simple tasks, such as grocery shopping or getting dressed
• Loss of appetite, losing weight, no food in the refrigerator or cupboards
• Lack of desire (or strength) to keep surroundings clean or prepare meals
• Forgets the name of common items, children, grandchildren or friends
• Little or no peer group/no interest in previously enjoyed friends or activities

Finally, families should consider alternatives to having a loved living alone if caring for the loved one is negatively affecting the caregiver(s) family life, work, finances, or emotional well-being. Too often, a caregiver will sacrifice self-care for the needs of an aging loved one – perhaps ignoring their own health warning signs, taking time off from work, absorbing bills that are not their own, or neglecting other important relationships and interests.

Family Meetings

A family meeting may be in order if one person is not responsible for, or doesn’t feel comfortable making decisions independent of others for the elderly person. Holding a family meeting can be helpful in that these meetings allow everyone who cares for the individual to contribute to the discussion, have their concerns heard, and feel helpful to the overall situation.

Often, it’s beneficial to have a outside person who has experience with geriatric behaviors and living issues facilitate the meeting – not only does the family benefit from expert advice, but an objective facilitator can also help maintain balance in what can be a stressful and difficult conversation for many.

Finding Help

Fortunately, there are professionals who can help you and your family member make informative decisions about care and living concerns. Physicians, social workers, geriatric specialists all can contribute to the conversation about keeping your loved one comfortable in their environment, while keeping them safe.

Your employee assistance program (EAP) may be able to help, too. A comprehensive EAP should offer an Eldercare Resource and Referral as part of their menu of employee services. By offering eldercare services, employers can lessen the impact eldercare issues have in the workplace by providing their employees with access to eldercare specialists. These specialists can help assess a loved one’s situation and provide direction in number of different areas such as home safety, memory impairment issues, coordinating family meetings, need-to-know info about health insurance and financial concerns, addressing caregiver stress, and more.

Center for Families & Children/Ease@Work – Photo by Patrick Gaul

The world is starting to figure out that early childhood education is very important. Ask any employee with children.  One of their biggest challenges is to balance work and parenthood. A good daycare arrangement will put the parent at ease when in the role of an employee and will set the child on a course to becoming a well-educated adult. While Ease@Work helps businesses to address this issue in the workplace, our parent company the Center for Families and Children (CFC) is addressing this issue on a societal level.

Before Ease@Work existed, there was the EASE Program – Employee Assistance SErvices and the Corporate Childcare Resource and Referral Program (CCR&R). Both were natural outgrowths of the two largest community-based programs of CFC: Behavioral Health programs and CFC Children’s Programs, which operate Cleveland-based high quality daycare centers. As EASE and CCR&R evolved to meet the changing needs of Ohio businesses, they were merged to create what is now known as Ease@Work. 

CFC’s Children’s Programs can trace their history back to the 1800’s when the Cleveland Day Nursery Association was one of the first agencies in this region to provide childcare. With over a century of experience in offering early childhood programs, CFC is one of the region’s experts on early learning.

Comments by CFC’s President and CEO, Sharon Sobol Jordan, were recently featured in the op-ed section of the Cleveland Plain Dealer. Jordan’s comments were part of a series of statements regarding the Jan. 17, 2010 PD article, “Change how kids learn – change the future,” about early childhood programs and how important they are to a child’s success – and ultimately, the success of the greater community.

 “High-quality learning programs focus on helping young children navigate their growing worlds, preparing them for a lifetime of learning,” Jordan said. “Children who are involved in early learning programs – via pre- and post-natal home visits and later in community early learning centers – are better poised for success in school and in life.”

Along with Jordan, Georgianna T. Roberts, president of the Board of Directors of the Hanna Perkins Center for Child Development, and Thea Wilson, executive director of the Office of Early Childhood Education, Cleveland Metropolitan School District, concur that early “intervention” is key to a child’s success. Education for parents/guardians, early assessment of behavioral or mental health issues, early learning programs and pre-kindergarten classes focusing on both the cognitive and socieo-emotional growth of a child all contribute to the success a child will experience in school and beyond.

To think programs such as these impact children only in terms of their school success would be short-sighted.  “Championing the investment in our youngest children is ‘the most effective way to reverse this community’s decline,’” Roberts said.

Providing parents/guardians with the education and tools to better care for their children is essential. Providing access to high quality daycare programming is the next step in laying the foundation for a child’s success in life, and ultimately, as a contributing member of the community.

 “The Center for Families and Children has five early learning centers in Cleveland and Cleveland Heights that have been recognized for their high quality and are nationally accredited, and we have been part of the community for more than 100 years,” said Jordan.

Ease@Work is proud to be a division of CFC, an organization that works hard in ”making success possible for people who choose to change their lives.”

Those in the community come to CFC because of a choice they’ve made – they want a better life for themselves, for their children, for their families, for their future. For some in our community, it’s easy to get off track – perhaps due to issues that walk hand-in-hand with living in poverty-stricken neighborhoods, or because of a mental illness, substance abuse problem or other life event. But if one of these people in our community wants to change their life, CFC is there to help by providing Early Learning Centers, Homebound Services, Youth Development Programs, Behavioral Health Services, Families and Fathers Together, Re-Entry Services and Family to Family programs. 

Ease@Work’s goal is similiar to that of CFC in that we foster ”better personal lives, for better work lives.” Much like CFC, Ease@Work is there for both the employees of our client companies and their management teams when they need us. As an EAP, employees come to us voluntarily when they need help with certain aspects of their lives. Jordan’s comments provide insight as to why Ease@Work is unique in our ability to provide assistance to employees with childcare issues. We do much more than tell employees where the nearest daycare center is located. Our childcare specialists draw from decades of expertise and provide valuable education, coaching and resources for employees struggling with the many issues associated with caring for children from birth through high school.

We think our success as a comprehensive EAP is doubly sweet. In providing EAP services to our contracted companies, we not only provide a valuable service to our clients, but Ease@Work in turn generates funds which are then returned to our non-profit parent company, CFC. These funds help provide the programs and services CFC offers to those who are in need of assistance…improving the quality of individual lives and our community as a whole.

But sometimes a parent/guardian needs more than a database seach for their childcare questions. That’s when childcare specialists can be helpful in assisting with child-related issues and parenting questions…questions about how to handle temper tantrums, poor sleep habits, toliet training etc. Questions that can’t be answered by a database. This is where the typical EAP falls short in terms of childcare services. Most don’t offer consultation with a childcare specialist who will take the time to discuss a parent’s concerns and offer education and suggestions addressing those issues.

The Ease@Work Childcare Resource and Referral Program has featured a staff of childcare specialists for decades.  Originally known as “Corporate Childcare”, it was an independent program of the Center for Families and Children until it was merged with the EAP and became Ease@Work.  And now, Ease has taken dependent care services a step further by adding Class Act School Age Services as an EAP benefit, helping parents/guardians who have moved beyond the baby and toddler years and into the more challenging school-age years.

“The Class Act School Age Services program was developed in order to provide EAP assistance to parents who need help beyond childcare resources, ” said Linda Hazen, Ease@Work childcare consultant. “Class Act focuses on the educational aspects of parenting a child from Kindergarten through 12th grade.”

Expert Guidance for Parents/Guardians

We know that although school is a routine part of growing up, it can also be a great source of stress for the whole family. And, we know that a lot of stress, worry and absenteeism can be decreased, or even prevented all together, if parents prepare themselves and their children for the various challenges encountered during the school age years.

Class Act helps address many of the common concerns parents have on a variety of school-related matters. Investigating school options, addressing academic or behavior concerns, or helping your child achieve in school is easy with help from someone who is familiar with the education system.

Guidance is available for parents of school-agers in a wide variety of subject areas, including the following:

General Education Services

• Public/Private School Options
• Alternative School Options
• Homework Assistance
• Tutoring Services
• Parent Coaching
• Parent/Teacher Conferences
• Home/School Relationships

Special Education

• Intervention Plans
• Behavior Plans
• Education Plans
• Document Review
• Parent/Student Advocacy
• Special Education Law
• Community Support Resources

Look to your EAP for dependent care services, including assistance with childcare issues and school-age consultations. It’s just another way organizations can help their workforce improve work-life balance and become more productive while on the job.

Most would agree that helpful neighbors and a sense of community is important, especially when raising children. Who would think a mom helping another family in the community would get in trouble for her neighborly deed?

Caring for a Neighborhood Children

By Valerie S. Nosek

Okay. So yours is the house all the kids in the neighborhood flock to. You have a great relationship with the other parents on your block and welcome their kids into your home. As parents in the neighborhood, the group has taken the attitude of “it takes a village” to monitor and care for the children of the neighborhood.

When another parent needs a helping hand, you step in and offer to let their kids come over to your home. In turn, when you and your husband need a night out, that neighboring parent will care for your child. No money is exchanged. It’s just one neighbor doing a favor for another.

And that’s the way it’s supposed to be…isn’t it?

Not according to a recent article on Yahoo News. Recently, one mom living in a Grand Rapids, Michigan suburb was warned by the Michigan Department of Human Services to cease and desist from caring for neighborhood kids. The article, State to mom: Stop baby-sitting neighbors’ kids, hit the news this week and has caused an uproar among parents in both the state of Michigan and other states.

The story is this: the bus stop is right at the end of this family’s driveway. So, this mom decided to do a favor for the other working parents in the neighborhood and allowed their kids (three neighbor children) to come to her home for about an hour before the bus arrived. This mom would then make sure all the kids got on the bus and off to school. Neighborly deed done.

But not so fast. After receiving a complaint from another neighbor, the Department of Human Services sent a letter to the mom citing state regulations that prohibit a person from caring for unrelated children in their home for more than four weeks each calendar year unless they are a licensed day-care provider.

So, do parents everywhere have to now fear trouble with the state if they do a favor for a neighbor and help out watching their child for a total of more than the equivalent of four weeks out of the year? (If you’re talking business days, that only 16 days out of 365 that you’re allowed to perform a helpful childcare-related act.)

According to Ease@Work childcare specialists, the answer is “no.” You don’t have to worry about a letter from Ohio officials with the Department of Human Services arriving in your mail.

“Ohio’s laws are not as stringent as Michigan’s, so we have homes that could do just what this mom was doing and under Ohio’s law, be exempt and within their rights to offer this type of service,” said Janet Schiavoni, Ease@Work Account Manager and expert in dependent care services.

“For many parents, what this mom was doing is often a perfect solution to resolving work-life balance issues,” said Linda Hazen, a childcare specialist with Ease. “In fact, I often suggest that parents look to other trusted parents in the neighborhood to help out with simple childcare needs.” 

Hazen presented the same example of when one parent has to arrive at work earlier than another in the neighborhood. “It makes sense to reach out to available resources, such as an available neighbor, who is willing to make sure your child gets on the bus along with their child or children,” she said. This is often a no-cost solution when parents form cooperative relationships with others who have similar childcare needs.

The only time individuals need to be concerned about state childcare regulations is if you are actually operating as a licensed Type A day care home. But, if you are operating as a Type B home, you would be exempt from the law.

“Ohio Day Care Licensing law defines Type B homes as homes that care for up to six children, of which no more than three are under the age of two, and if any of the childcare provider’s own children are under six years old they must be included in the total count,” Hazen said. If this mom were to be living in Ohio, she would be considered exempt from the law because she was only caring for three unrelated children and one of her own.

As an employee assistance program, Ease@Work offers expert advice on childcare and other dependent care services to client companies and their employees.

Employees More Likely to be Caregivers

Talk to any baby boomer and chances are likely they have personal experience in assisting an aging parent or elderly relative in some way. In fact, according to the U.S. Department of Labor, 54 percent of the work force will be caring for an elder by 2008.

But why should employers be concerned about employees who take care of older relatives?

Quite simply because eldercare issues directly impact the employer’s bottom line to the tune of billions each year. A 1999 report by the MetLife Mature Market Institute “estimated that U.S. companies lose $11 billion to $29 billion a year in reduces productivity;” an upcoming report is expected to show those losses as even greater (AARP Bulletin, May 2006).

Caregiving Issues Multi-Faceted

Human resource departments are finding elder caregiving issues are complicated; there are two distinct sides to the equation. First, there are the practical concerns – those related to safety, living arrangements, medical costs, insurance coverage and/or assistance, managing doctor’s appointments etc. Then, there’s the issue of what impact caregiving responsibilities have on the employee – stress and the resulting negative influences on health and well-being.

While companies have recognized eldercare as a productivity problem, the focus has been on finding resources for the family member, not in addressing the mental and emotional health needs of the employee doing the caregiving. Fortunately, this is changing.

Re-Focusing EAP Services to Meet Caregiver Needs

A recent Wall Street Journal article (June, 21, 2007, page D1) reported “…in the first shift in elder-care benefits in years, a few employers are offering elder-care programs aimed at the health and well-being of the workers themselves. By encouraging workers who have eldercare duties to take better care of themselves, employers hope not only to raise productivity, but to scale down healthcare costs.”

The Ease@Work employee assistance program has been an leader among EAPs, offering eldercare assistance to caregivers in both – community resources aimed toward the needs of the geriatric family member and for the health and well-being of the employee. The Ease team of eldercare specialists have expertise focused on the separate sides of the eldercare issue; employees seeking assistance through Ease@Work have access to the support they need personally as a caregiver in addition to up-to-date resources and practical information.

“Caregivers are usually working and keeping up a house, and they are on-call 24/7 and feeling overwhelmed,” said Margaret Chesler, an eldercare specialist with Ease. ” That puts caregivers at high risk for depression and health problems.”

It is clear with an increasingly aging population, more and more of those in the work force are going to be responsible for an elder family member’s care. The solution for employers begins with a comprehensive EAP that includes an awareness of, and the ability to address, eldercare and caregiving as an integrated issue.

Talk to any “Jane” or “Joe” on the street and chances are they’ll be in agreement that money’s tight and they’re feeling financially strained. In the words of one university’s report, “There’s hardly a family that will escape the steadily growing financial crisis that is gripping much of our nation.”

Children have concerns about the current financial situation, too. They hear scary words on the news such as ‘foreclosure‘ or ‘depression‘ . Many wonder why the grown up people on the news are crying - maybe they’ve lost a home or their job. Or, perhaps something kids can relate to even more…imagine the fear a child may have when they see someone who has had to give up a beloved pet because of a move. And, while some younger children may not understand news reports, they do notice when parents are uneasy about spending or finances.

Now is the time to begin talking to your children about what is happening out in the financial world and how it might impact your family.

Parents who are open and honest, without resorting to fearful dialogue, can instill a sense of security in children by openly talking about the situation. If there’s an honest dialogue about how the whole family can help out, you might be surprised at how willing your children are to making adjustments. Having a family meeting is a good way to get everyone involved in a discussion about financial health.

Explaining the Facts

Don’t share your fears. Make sure you are calm and comfortable before you open any serious discussion about money. Rehearse what you’ll say and ease your own worries beforehand by talking with a friend.

Be consistent. Emphasize familiarity, continuity and the comfort of simple routines. This will reassure everyone that some things still remain within your control.

Be heard, not overheard. No matter how big or small your financial problems, don’t discuss the painful details unless you are certain your children are out of earshot.

Identify what matters. Don’t hide any concrete changes that might disrupt your kids’ lives — changing schools, having to move to a smaller house — but assure them that as a family you will make the most of it.

Give them some power. Challenge your children to help you find ways to save more or budget better. Let them have a voice about which things the family can cut back on.

Disconnect. Turn the TV off; constantly exposing children to hyped-up headlines and downbeat news is bad for the psyche.

- Sources of information above include The University of Wisconsin Extension-Pepin County and www.kiplinger.com .

An Ease@Work Childcare specialist can help employees to prepare for a conversation with children and can also help in a practical way by exploring less expensive childcare options.  A free financial consultation can help with budgeting suggestions, credit consolidation advice, mortgage refinance advice and in many other ways.